Monthly Archives: October 2018

SwirlingFire: Friendships

Friendships Do friendships have a season ? I’ve been reflecting upon the last twelve months. October 2017 was not a good one. Disappointments, several cancellations of birthday plans and consequent loss of work and income, lies and deceit.  Realisations of deep rooted memories returning and #Motherships diagnosis of cognitive impairment. I was totally overwhelmed without anyone to confide… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Swirling Reflections

Swirling Reflections Sitting up in bed with a cuppa. Awake for hours. I set the alarm for a day I’m not working.  Plus the clocks went back an hour (GMT), so a 5.30am rude awakening. Feeling the grip at my throat; It’s not the physical hand of another. It’s the mental vice that held me “in my place”… Read More »

Am I That Different ?

Chatting with someone the other evening, they hit me with this:- You have an intelligent eloquent style of writing that’s different to other cd/sissy / masochist/exploratory

SwirlingFire: Fortitude

Content Warning: mild references to sexual/mental abuse Fortitude noun: bravery when dealing with pain or difficulty, esp. over a long period “… I must admit, I find your fortitude in this roller coaster mind boggling……. ” October It’s always been a month of mixed emotions. As a child it trawls up  memories of birthday parties and blowing out candles on a… Read More »

Emotional Content

That’s part of a famous line uttered by Bruce Lee in Enter the Dragon. If there’s one thing that makes melody easier to identify in the swings and roundabouts of daily life it is in the expression of emotions. Emotion and me have had a rocky relationship over the years.  We kind of gave up on each other… Read More »

A Personal Journey Through D/s Hypnosis – Part 7, To Surrender Is To Win

I have an unexpected quiet day which gives me some leisure to put a few things in better and broader context.  The last brainwashing and hypnosis sessions have had effects that I’m still processing and learning.  On the back of a fresh foundation of submission, service and obedience driven deeper than ever in the brainwashing, the following hypnosis… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Sink or Swim

Content Warning: mild references to sexual/mental abuse Sink Or Swim Today someone posed the theory “….. The reality is that most of the time is spent treading water……..?” The statement passed me by me yet started to swirl around inside my thoughts for a few hours. It made me realise that I’ve never trodden water – in the… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Empty On The Inside …

“The unexamined life is not worth living…….” – Socrates, at his trial. I’m not a classics scholar nor claiming to be adroit in ancient philosophy texts.  This phrase popped into my head after a non alcoholic long lunch with someone that I once thought of as a very good friend.  We’re no longer as close as we once… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Who am I ? Who are YOU ?

Who am I …? Who are YOU …? @SwirlingFire How we describe ourselves is not the way others see us. Forget the outside package. That’s not who we are.  That’s what we look like. That’s a big problem for me.  Many of us make snap decisions based on external/visible traits.  We rarely see the true depth of someone’s… Read More »