Category Archives: #SB4MH

SwirlingFire: Game, Set. Match

Reading Time: 2 minutes Game, Set. Match That’s a great Avi As the drool hits the screen Another great body All buffed Shiny clean lace, heels, stockings Can you hear the clasps snap I’m new I’m exciting My bio screams “bait” The opening gambit The giggle back kissy face emojis Followback chat The usual style The change underway The tentative enquiries targets… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Gratitude

Reading Time: 4 minutes Gratitude It’s the weirdest thing. Seeing my Twitter @name in a compilation list  – The Top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2019 I’m not a nuts and bolts, dildo testing, vibrator wielding, uncovered gusset angled writer. Whilst, I quickly add – zero judgements of others – this is, after all, how we learn from each other and find our… Read More »

SwirlingFire: One Wish

Reading Time: 4 minutes One Wish Thoughts keep swirling into view then out again. My head aches from too many thoughts. I’m not a scholarly deep thinker I’m an over thinker An over analyser The last few days (at time of writing) have not been the best.  I thought I was doing a lot better.  It’s the first meltdown I’ve had in… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Consent

Reading Time: 2 minutes Consent Stomach churning Tightening against acid burns Bile rises more often now Crippling pain that wakes me from sleep Hot sweats cold shivers Nausea Vomiting How delightful Complicated from Physical damage Lies balancing on top of more lies An upturned pyramid Angled steps heading nowhere An Escher print of a complicated architectural testament of how expertly the crafted… Read More »

Social Media

Reading Time: 5 minutes   My list of what is social media is defined by age.  My first access to the Internet was in 1991.  The company I’d just joined had installed a Cisco router with a 14,400 dial on demand modem.  A small SCO Unix box was the means for providing everyone with an email account.  I became the de facto… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Mental Media

Reading Time: 2 minutes Mental Media Scrolling and eye rolls Click and zoom No one’s alone When your phones in the room Laughing and joking Banter runs rife Nobody knows When you cyber fuck someone’s wife Writing deep prose Spilling ones guts The Majority laugh They still think you’re nuts Buying lace knickers For the one you adore It’s all consensual An… Read More »

SwirlingFire: The Assessment

Reading Time: 4 minutes The Assessment & Swirling Twirls I need more therapy. There. I said it. Cue eye rolling and yawns for those that think I should’ve been locked up in a facility with my mouth taped shut a long time ago.  It’s easier to know one needs counselling than to actively search for someone qualified without agenda to talk to about… Read More »

SwirlingFire: The “Why?” Of blogging

Reading Time: 4 minutes The “Why?” Of blogging I’m forever trying to figure out what I’ve done in this life to attract abusive, malevolent, intrusive, selfish, violent – verbal, physical and bullying – behaviour from two faced judgemental “perfect” people. It still continues, without direct contact – unprovoked. There will be more exploratory blogs of processing that will be written before I… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Rituals and Memories

Reading Time: 3 minutes Rituals and Memories It’s the way I tell ’em  – Frank Carson, Comedian I like my life to be structured, ordered and in manageable sized tasks.  It’s the best way I can handle all facets of external Influences without becoming overwhelmed and not losing my cool. My daily rituals are tweaked, trialled, tested and usually fail. I’m still… Read More »

SwirlingFire: You’re Worthless So I Subtweet

Reading Time: 4 minutes You’re Worthless So I Subtweet I won’t ever ask you questions I won’t communicate Or share My thoughts With you, I’m too cowardly. I tell My friends about you. I make incorrect assumptions about you and your words, to mock you and your pathetic life. I know nothing about you I never read your blogs. I pull your words… Read More »

SwirlingFire: The Hero Is The Villian

Reading Time: 4 minutes The Hero Is The Villain My mind is awash with swirling thoughts crashing into each other and not having anywhere to safely stow them whilst I’m processing the dozen other thoughts that were already crashing together inside my head. Sensory overload is a documented state.  Only once my thoughts have calmed down to a gentler slower movement am I… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Overshare (#sb4mh repost)

Reading Time: 5 minutes SwirlingFire: Overshare (#sb4mh repost) I’ve chosen blog post #24 to submit to this weeks #sb4mh  “Select a blog BEFORE you found #sb4mh”, This particular post (Jan 2019) was, on reflection, a very difficult and lonely time for me. 2018 had thrown some cleverly devious manipulation into the mix whilst I was deeply into pre trauma counselling.  Someone I… Read More »

No Options Left

Reading Time: 6 minutes Content Notice – Incitement to suicide, proceed with caution In this week’s description for the #SB4MH prompt, Cat wrote: This week’s prompt is open but with a twist. Share the very first post that you wrote about mental health. Share the one you published before you knew about SB4MH. It can be about your issues or someone else’s issues.… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Mirage

Reading Time: 4 minutes Mirage I’ve reached an unthought of number of 50 blogs posted and hosted with @sissymaidmelody (Swirlingfire: Posts). I’m still in my infancy of blogging.  I like the mental process behind writing. It allows me to harness my thoughts in order to understand my life and to process the ebb and flow of past events. My blogs are all… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Selfie or Selfish

Reading Time: 5 minutes Selfie or Selfish Quick glimpses into people’s lives are fascinating.  I find myself zooming in on the background to gain a peek into personalities.  All I gain from this is that I have a remarkably messy bedroom and many of you have storage solutions that would put Marie Kondo to shame! Why do adults on Twitter social media… Read More »

SwirlingFire: The Path To Enlightenment

Reading Time: 7 minutes Content Notice:  “As with all my pieces, I write from personal experience not make believe fantasy.  Please exercise care.  No detailed trauma.  References to ‘scat play’ and clinical PTSD lists”   The Path To Enlightenment Triggers can be both positive and negative. I know this may sound counter-intuitive, but bear with me. To understand what a TRUE trigger… Read More »