SwirlingFire: Betrayal
Betrayal
A weird feeling in the pit of my stomach
It’s not anxiety
It’s different
It feels like it’s attached
Deep inside my core.
I thought at first I needed more water to drink,
The trembling of dehydration in soaring temperatures
That moment before
The room goes silent
You feel as though you’re about to vomit
A hot and cold sweat descends
Your stomach grips your throat
You melt onto the floor
Barely aware
Barely a care
Is this how it feels when Death strikes?
A gradual ebbing away
First sight, then sound
Conscious of surrounding aromatic mixtures
Losing muscle control
Hardly a care in the world
Falling like a pebble.
Silence
Darkness
The stillness of nothingness.
Realising you’re not dead, all you see are the feet
Several pairs of feet
Wondering why people don’t care for their footwear
Dirty, scuffed and neglected.
The cool tile against your face feels heavenly
Regaining sense of reality
Realising that you’re still alive.
Faced flushed with returning blood
The heart was pumping away so fast seconds ago
It needed life’s juice to protect itself and the brain.
You hear voices
So many miles away
Still no recollection of how you ended up like this
The voices are strange, you know the words but they’re not registering
Someone calling your name
You don’t know the voice
You don’t know the name
Someone holds your hand
It’s been such a long time since you felt genuine non agenda touch
It’s that simple gesture that pulls you back to the world of the living
A kindness of strangers
Help in distress.
Someone in a uniform scoops you up in their arms
You begin to feel boiling tears start to fall
The voice becomes louder
The words become clearer.
“You’re safe. Do you know where you are? Do you know your name?”
You try to speak but words won’t sound out aloud.
Your head spins as you try to sit up
Shaking, embarrassed, weary and sad.
You’re not dead
You’re drained of living
A familiar feeling of a water bottle is placed in your hand and lifted to your lips.
“You’re safe. It’s going to be okay” says the uniformed stranger, “Don’t give up, your brain needed to give you a wake up call. It’s time to start over”
The recall of memory
What was once hidden
Was not
Forever
The Betrayal
@Swirlingfire, 2 July 2019
Written for the #WickedWednesday meme of “Betrayal”. Why not go check out the other posts by clicking on the button.
July 7, 2019 @ 9:46 am
Thankyou
It’s difficult for me to see this is anything other than learning to record my thoughts/just another day.
July 6, 2019 @ 5:00 pm
Wow. Marie’s right – intense. 💜
July 5, 2019 @ 3:42 pm
Oh! Yeah, Marie’s right.
July 6, 2019 @ 9:10 am
Thank you SD 🌻
July 4, 2019 @ 7:37 pm
This is intense…
Rebel xox
July 6, 2019 @ 9:10 am
Thank you Marie 🌻