SwirlingFire: An Uncomfortable Path ….

I always thought the main reason for life was having dreams and goals, working hard and achieving great personal things in life.  The destination. Many years later, older, I’m not so sure any wiser or mature, I find I’m growing in ways that feel so alien. As much as I dislike the phrase, this new time in my… Read More »

Why is the Brain Full of Pepperoni ?

“In my opinion, there is no aspect of reality beyond the reach of the human mind. Stephen Hawking”

Exploring your mind is something that can be done whilst warm under the duvet. A post for #WickedWednesday prompt oof

SwirlingFire: Common Denominator

Noise Phobic or a Snob ?

I can come across as a right anti-social little bugger.  One of the reasons is that I have low threshold tolerance to ambient noise.  I’ve always been that way and recently it’s got significantly worse.  The trigger for this thought train came from a Twitter thread on films.  It becomes a bit of a joke when similar discussions… Read More »

melody Does Have Her Own Personality

Something I keep nagging at is how real is melody ?  Is she some kind of play acting thrown at me by my psyche as a joke to excuse a cross dressing fetish by pretending it’s real ?

SwirlingFire: #Blocked

  Your grief is not tolerated here – #Blocked I was angry in the past when I was unable to articulate the flood of memories of my past and later life trauma returning.  Unfortunately people were caught up inside my emotional tsunami.  A SwirlWind or a SwirlStorm as it was later referenced Only a few people had the… Read More »

Beyond Trust

I tend to get caught up in semantics and precisely what a word means to me.  Lately my thoughts have turned to the word vulnerable and it’s sibling, vulnerability and how my changing perceptions relate to another key word, trust.

SwirlingFire: Truth and Respect

Truth and Respect “…. You play with your prey before death – I go straight for the jugular…..” The most insightful way I learn about my self daily is from conversations with trusted confidantes.  These people are an extremely rare commodity in my life.  I never trust easily, with good reason.  I don’t offer my friendship unless I’m… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Coffee and WiFi

Coffee and WiFi I’m sat in the little coffee place I’ve walked passed a thousand times.  It’s the only place open locally to sit and write with WiFi.  It’s full of men having very late breakfast style plates of food.  It’s bustling and very popular with the non coffee house type set one normally sees on a regular… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Kintsugi

  Kintsugi – Beautifully Flawed I’m not entirely certain why I’ve been in two minds to release the most current (as yet unavailable) blog post. The hardest part is not in the writing but the “setting free” – not the words/grammar/subject matter.  It’s the knowledge that my thoughts are committed to writing. I was posed this question:  “… Read More »

Endorphin Rush

Content Warning Pictures of needle play It’s not everyone’s cup of tea and less than two years ago it wouldn’t have been mine, either.  In fact, it was something of a hard limit.

2018 – Perhaps Better Than I Thought

I wasn’t going to go all retrospective about 2018 until I thought that in some ways it’s been quite momentous and that I need to acknowledge and celebrate that.

The Christmas House of Horrors

This post is me cathartically venting.  It is my way of dumping an unpleasant time over Christmas and moving on (until next time). CONTENT WARNING This post contains examples of the stream of consciousness I was subjected to over two days of Christmas.  Be warned that it contains examples of :- Transphobia / Homophobia Racism Misogyny Body shaming… Read More »

SwirlingFire: The Hour Glass

Whilst trying to reconcile my past traumas (until very recently repressed) and also with my current state of learning how I’d been treated badly by a d-type, I started thinking about the chronology of my life. Memories comes thick and fast. A minimum of a shudder – and sometimes, a full body blow impact. Time has made me… Read More »

Time Rendered Meaningless

The last brainwashing session completely destroyed my sense of time.  It was no accident, she designed it that way and although outcomes with hypnosis are far from being guaranteed, her design succeeded quite spectacularly.

The Beat of the Music

I don’t have a soundtrack to my life.  I’m not one of those people who has a constant need for music, I find it too distracting and it will trigger my hatred of noise unless I’m prepared. Attending opera and concerts is a different matter and I can think of some sublime songs/arias (whatever you want to call… Read More »

More Sploshing for melody

Earlier in the year I documented a moment for a number of firsts.  I was persuaded to partake of a sploshing session and it was the first time being filmed.  That adventure was detailed here In Which Melody Exposes Herself. Several months ago I had my arm lightly twisted to do it all again.  I don’t need to describe… Read More »

Who Do You Think I Am ?

That’s probably not the question you might think it is. What people see is in the eye of the beholder and over the years I have had some fascinating conversations and insights as to what people think they see in melody.

100 Not Out

A surprising stat has come to my attention.  My previous post was my 100th on this blog.  Since starting the blog, that works out to about 11 posts a month or slightly better than 1 every 3 days.

A Personal Journey Through D/s Hypnosis – Part 8, Scrambling Time Sense

I’ve been experiencing the brainwashing sessions for a year, there are a number evolutions over that time as both of us have learned so much. The key word for this post is TIME.