A Personal Journey Through D/s Hypnosis – Part 7, To Surrender Is To Win

I have an unexpected quiet day which gives me some leisure to put a few things in better and broader context.  The last brainwashing and hypnosis sessions have had effects that I’m still processing and learning.  On the back of a fresh foundation of submission, service and obedience driven deeper than ever in the brainwashing, the following hypnosis… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Sink or Swim

Content Warning: mild references to sexual/mental abuse Sink Or Swim Today someone posed the theory “….. The reality is that most of the time is spent treading water……..?” The statement passed me by me yet started to swirl around inside my thoughts for a few hours. It made me realise that I’ve never trodden water – in the… Read More »

A Personal Journey Through D/s Hypnosis – Part 5, Crumbling Barriers

There’s a common wish fulfilment myth about hypnosis that at the swing of a watch or the snap of a finger that you can be instantly made into somebody or something new.  For someone who is struggling this seems to be a deceptively simple solution to all their problems.  Instead it can seriously add to the problems.

SwirlingFire: Empty On The Inside …

“The unexamined life is not worth living…….” – Socrates, at his trial. I’m not a classics scholar nor claiming to be adroit in ancient philosophy texts.  This phrase popped into my head after a non alcoholic long lunch with someone that I once thought of as a very good friend.  We’re no longer as close as we once… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Who am I ? Who are YOU ?

Who am I …? Who are YOU …? @SwirlingFire How we describe ourselves is not the way others see us. Forget the outside package. That’s not who we are.  That’s what we look like. That’s a big problem for me.  Many of us make snap decisions based on external/visible traits.  We rarely see the true depth of someone’s… Read More »

A Guest Writer – Meet Swirlingfire

I had my start in blogging as a result of a very unexpected and flattering approach to write a guest post on another blog.  Now it’s my turn to offer a space to another person. I’ve only known her for a few weeks.  She’s complex, witty and dealing with the curve balls that life throws at us.  I’m… Read More »

Changing Priorities

Sometimes I have a stream of consciousness that expresses itself over many months.  Things that fill the mind in the small hours of sleeplessness.  Quite amazing the personal thoughts that end up here as if this was actually a totally private space.

Educating Innocence

It’s now a lost part of London, back then it was a simple forgotten backwater.  I loved the area when I visited.  R had a pokey little flat on the south side of the river, just a bit down stream from Woolwhich.  The view from the lounge was surprisingly magnificent, looking over towards the City Airport with the… Read More »

The Last Illusion

Love – the last illusion of the illusionless man This quote is from the very end of Le Carre’s Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy.  First read in my teen years, I always considered it rather profound.  As the years have gone by I’m not so sure that I know what it means now.

Invaluable Lesson In The Dungeon

It’s not often you enter the dungeon and get greeted with “God you look awful !” I’ve no idea how I looked, but I sure felt terrible.  Sod’s law had come to play.  It had been some time since the previous CP session and I’d really been looking forward to this one until my body went on strike… Read More »

Self Indulgent Post – II

Today is a poignant day. Five years ago today I got the 5 am phone call to say that my mother had died.  By itself that was not a surprise, the end had been inevitable for some time. 

Nodal Involvement

The other weekend was a trip to Glyndebourne with the former mistress.  As well as lots of good food, the Glyndebourne experience (the opera was hit and miss, but this post isn’t a review) and too much alcohol late in to the nights, it was also a time for deep conversation. I must admit that this is an… Read More »