- NSFW cartoon of FemDom castration (at the end)
This post can be blamed on @PosyChurchgate. She commented on my Asexuality post and made the mistake of asking me to expand on castration fetish.
It’s the sort of topic that elicits sniggers and winces and yet, surprisingly, it also garners more quiet interest than you might think. It’s one of those things where there’s a fair amount of quiet interest and morbid fascination coupled with a reluctance to acknowledge the fact. There’s an immense amount of FemDom, gay and transgender porn around castration themes.
References to eunuchs and castration myths and rituals are there in the earliest historical writings. My own historical interests are generally with the late Roman Republic and by this time the Romans had co-opted the mother goddess Cybele in to their pantheon, just as they had with many gods/goddesses that can be traced back to the ancient Greeks and in this case, Cybele and her antecedents most likely went way further back in to pre-history.
The priesthood of Cybele were eunuchs and in Roman times March 24th was the ‘Day of Blood’ where priestly postulants castrated themselves in her worship. Wonderfully enough, at the same time they assumed female dress with long bleached hair and heavy makeup. I have a soft spot for something I read of them recently, on feast days they would dance themselves into ecstasy and whip themselves to a bloody mess.
The Romans could be a funny bunch. As a citizen, the act of emasculation was banned in the time of Domitian because of a certain squeamishness. That never stopped the Romans castrating non-citizens. Indeed, at the top end of the slave market, highly educated non-citizens would readily become eunuchs to obtain high status positions.
The early Church as it became the Catholic Church had it’s own problems with castration as devotion. To many, it smacked of heresy, for some it was emulating the pagan priesthoods such as Cybele. And so, whilst discouraged, the Church ended up annually encouraging thousands of small boys to become castrati because they’d finally cracked down on the role of women and wouldn’t let them speak or sing in church. If you think this is ancient history, the last castrato of the Vatican died less than 100 years ago.
The method of castration might well have been a sharp knife for a low status slave, but for others it was a long-ish process where from (preferably) pre-puberty a young boy’s testicles would be roughly massaged everyday until they were destroyed.
I find the history instructive since it shows that castration has been part of human consciousness for a long time, even actively sought and embraced in some circumstances. In many cases it will have been a punishment and in others, if not a reward in itself, a gateway to a more rewarding life.
Before getting personal there’s a small bit of terminology. Castration is the removal of the testicles in either a single or double orchiectomy. The removal of the penis, with or without accompanying castration is a penectomy. Casual references tend to use castration to mean either or both.
What may come as a surprise to readers is that castration fantasies are not confined to those potentially on the path to transition. In fact, by the time you’re more certain of that path it’s probably regarded less as a fantasy than it is a practicality.
What is very common is for a sub to want to give ownership of his sex and genitals to a dominant owner. This might be as straightforward as a ball busting fetish where extreme play could destroy the testicles.
At the personal level I’m familiar with chastity as the gateway to darker desires. The motives for getting into chastity play are complex and varied. Often it’s talked about in terms of devotion and sacrifice. Giving control of your sexual needs and functions to someone. An almost insane need to up the level of devotion by sacrificing more.
As I better recognise now, behind such drivers I also had the spectre of an asexually derived lack of interest in physical sex and background gender dysphoria. I’ve never hated my genitalia as some do, I just had no real use for them by then and was working towards not missing them if they weren’t there.
Locking the penis away in a chastity cage is a powerful act. Even if it’s just for short term play it has overtones that play consciously and unconsciously with both the desires and fears of castration. Many, perhaps most subs seem to prefer playing on the fear aspect, the threat of permanently losing sexual function if their devotion wavers whilst still knowing they are fundamentally safe from mutilation. This kind of dynamic tends to play on castration being the ultimate sacrifice for love.
As I moved towards and into permanent chastity my outlook began to evolve. The chastity status no longer being defined by the device which simply becomes an uncomfortable inconvenience. Both the physical and mental processes of reaching permanent chastity change the desire and indeed ability to translate mental arousal into physical arousal.
Many readers might recoil at that, others nod sagely.
I know some subs who have reached this point by themselves. I won’t address it, but here is where the body modification and “nullo” fetish scenes are liable to play out.
Chastity play, however, more generally requires someone to be the keyholder. Someone to be submissive to, someone to guide the journey, enforce it and enjoy providing the mind fuck experience.
What may come as a surprise is that within the chastity fetish scene, of those who are female keyholders they commonly have a castration fetish of their own – all the dommes I have known have it to varying degrees. Chastity play with a common castration fetish can be very powerful. You might say that with FemDom, this is an ultimate power exchange.
When the chastity relationship ended, the chastity itself was a permanent condition. I had no reason to wish to revert to sexual activity – it was looking at this in retrospect a few years later that helped confirm being asexual.
I was quite happy existing in that limbo until I came across this on FetLife:
The Castration Fantasy
As we know not all castration is related to transitioning, but whatever your reason this can be extremely frustrating for someone seeking to experience the totality of being castrated.
However, it is not completely out of reach – hypnosis can produce the desired effect of castration.
Using simple suggestive techniques to make your mind believe that your cock and balls no longer work because you have been chemically castrated, or you have had a penectomy and what is there is not what you see.
Plus there is the added bonus that if you find it’s not what you wanted, expected or can cope with unlike the finality of actual physical castration it can be reversed!
The mind is a powerful tool and it’s how we harness it to make things you thought were impossible come true.
Would you be willing to have your brain reprogammed to undergo mental castration?
And that’s how I met my current domme. Some of that journey has been related in this blog and it has followed some of those themes, though the focus is now not so much male emasculation as providing a pathway for melody’s development.
She has a very strong castration fetish. Many of her most popular FemDom film clips cater to the castration fetish scene.
Would either of us do it for real ? Only in a medically approved way. Back street castration undoubtedly happens but is too fraught with complications counter to RACK. The Spanner case still has legal precedent, consent to such an act is meaningless and can’t be used in defence.
However, working within that limitation the hypnosis has long term effects. I do stress that it is an aid to realising existing desires, it does not plant new ones. Or at least no new ones not compatible with the psyche.
Twenty years ago castration was very much just a dark unformed fantasy.
Fifteen years ago, on my chastity journey it became a more formed fantasy, almost the logical conclusion and end game eagerly encouraged by my mistress.
Ten years ago as I started to understand there was something real inside called melody it became more of a transition fantasy that would see melody realised.
Three years ago started an acceleration related to the massive growth of melody. It’s hard to say now that castration is still a fetish or a fantasy, or an inevitability. I don’t envisage sex as a male being on the agenda or being possible and I’d be happy aesthetically if the penis and testicles weren’t there. It’s an interesting question that if I had female genitalia by surgery would I want sex – highly unlikely.