I hadn’t thought of posting today until an exchange on Twitter had melody in a bit of a spin – in a very nice way.
This morning I decided it was warm enough to be time to try on a rather short LBD. I took some pictures and was sort of ok enough with them to post on Twitter. The result left me rather flustered. When I look at my own pictures I’m very critical, as we all probably are. In my case I see things that aren’t as feminine as I would wish. For people like myself there’s a strong desire to ‘pass’. We don’t want to stand out or push ourselves in other people’s faces, the ultimate is actually not to be noticed because others see nothing incongruous in the projected image to jar their senses. Their senses accept that we belong. Or if one is to be noticed it is entirely within the projected role.
I won’t name names [unless they want me to] but I received a reply from a male friend complimenting my legs – well the dress is a bit short and there’s more of the legs on display than usual 😮 My slightly flippant reply (whatever else I am, I am still British) alluded to him being a kind flatterer and a smoothie. I know a few of the ladies will smile and agree with that and thought no more about it as just part of the Twitter banter.
The subsequent reply choked me a bit. When seeing the pictures he hadn’t thought “is this a male masquerading as female ?”
He saw my nylon clad legs in the same way he saw and liked them on the ladies in the circle that sometimes post artful pictures of their legs. For some it’s a bit of a trademark and they do look very good. Whilst that seems to have been a bit of a revelation to him to understand about himself. You can imagine what it meant to me being unprompted and unfiltered.
No judgement based on knowing I’m fundamentally male, just a natural response to the image and role I want to project and was sure I was failing miserably at.
If you read this, you know who you are. It’s the unwitting compliments that are genuine and mean the most. Thank you, you’ve no idea how deeply melody felt it.