I’ve been asked what it feels like to be hypnotised ? Some are curious and some have read fantasies of erotic mind control stories who wonder how the reality compares.
Many years ago, I too read some of the mind control stories, I can still even recall one or two favourites. To a degree, despite trying to be rational, these coloured my preconceptions when I started erotic hypnosis. It’s no different to anything else when we move from fantasy to reality, it takes a little time to flush out the false perceptions.
There are many ways to experience hypnosis and I’m not going to explore them here. Instead I will focus on the personal experience with a real live, warm fleshed domme. A chance encounter with a FetLife ad proved to be one of the best chance events of my life. Unlike the masses of MP3 and video that are available, working with a single person who knows you inside out and tailors the sessions expressly for you kind of blows my socks off. And far from incidentally, she has an investment in the process, things she wants to see me achieve and a massive sense of enjoyment as she sees results from suggestions and triggers.
To approach hypnosis, in whatever form, you need to do a couple of things. Suspend scepticism and expunge the myths of the erotic mind control stories.
Hypnosis is about being in a relaxed state of body and mind. You can learn to do this by yourself, and it certainly will help when being guided through a hypnotic induction. Very few people can’t go in to this state, we go there every day. Losing track of time whilst staring at the screen, the realisation when driving on the motorway that you can’t consciously recall landmarks you know you have passed.
Most people who say they can’t be hypnotised are probably lying to themselves.
Often the fantasy myths of hypnosis revolve around being taken under – often involuntarily – and waking up a completely different person, a new persona, new perceptions and a new life. If it really worked like that, hypnotists would have a queue many miles long outside their practices.
To give some indication of how hypnosis feels, I’ll relate my impressions and feelings of my first session with her, which of course, had added nerves and wasn’t actually D/s related.
There you are, laying back on a padded leather bench trying to clear your mind of the thoughts racing around at a thousand miles an hour. The relaxing background music starts and then her voice. Slow, soothing, deliberate. Shutting your eyes to follow the induction. As a non-visual person I feel the imagery to be quite abstract rather than real in my mind’s eye. The eyelids keep flickering, wanting to open. It’s a feature of the whole session that it seems I have to concentrate on keeping them shut.
My mind does not seem to shut down. It hears her words and analyses them, dissects them to hone in on interesting concepts. At other times, word and idea association sends my mind in to long flights of weird thought chains. Even conscious of slight arousal at the situation I find myself in. I am convinced that I am in full control, I am not hypnotised, just enjoying being relaxed in the company of a rather beautiful woman. I could open my eyes and get up at any time I want, but I don’t feel that I want or have to.
At some point she begins the count up and I feel mild sadness that the peacefulness is about to end, but obviously, I haven’t been hypnotised. The surprise really hits me when she finishes the count up and commands “open your eyes”. Those eyelids I thought I’d been struggling to keep closed for the whole session are now extremely reluctant to open. I don’t want to leave the peace of that relaxed state.
Honesty required me to acknowledge that I’d been put under her hypnotic spell and that by itself was a relief. Yet, if I’d been hypnotised, why did I remember so much of what she said and suggested ? Although I felt no different, I knew something potentially profound had happened and if she’d managed to hypnotise me, then perhaps there was hope to realise the dreams that led me to her.
What neither of us could know was how deeply any of her suggestions had been taken. I think to the surprise of both of us, it didn’t take long to find out.
Those who fantasise about some ‘evil hypnotist’ changing them overnight rather miss the point. It’s a lazy attitude of ‘I kinda want something but don’t want to put in any effort’. A bit like people who want to lose weight and hope that there’s some sort of miracle pill that will take care of the effort for them.
The most fundamental concept in hypnosis is that you can’t make anyone do anything that they don’t want to do. This is worth remembering for anyone wary of trying hypnosis. The corollary is that if deep down you really want something, hypnosis can be a very good way to start actualising it.
I think my early sessions were primarily a dialogue between my domme and my conscious mind. As I relaxed more and went deeper, the dialogue transfered to the sub-conscious and it’s the sub-conscious that is the protector and gate-keeper.
Surface desires and fantasies can not become deep rooted via hypnosis if the sub-conscious does not agree that this is what you want, or need.
Results can be surprisingly vivid if the hypnotist is able to target the sub-conscious with dialogue it totally agrees with and desires. [Note to anyone contemplating this. It requires honest and open work with your hypnotist for them to even guess what this is. And your first step is a difficult and brutally open and honest dialogue with yourself.]
The manifestation of results from that first session were a real surprise. It’s a common technique in hypnosis to suggest self-visualisation. She suggested I visualise myself naked in front of a mirror. At that time she didn’t know about melody, and even to me melody was a barely acknowledged fantasy. What she couldn’t know back then was that what I saw in that virtual mirror was not an overweight male figure but an idealised female figure. It was the first key to unlocking melody as a genuine entity in her own right and it happened by the accident of how my sub-conscious interpreted those very first suggestions.
For the purpose of narrative that all sounds very instantaneous. It’s not, apart from some very early awakenings and realisations. We’ve continued working on this for the last 2 1/2 years, very slowly and carefully.
She’s a highly skilled domme and in a CP session can read body language such that she knows to within a gnat’s whisker when the stress signs say that someone has had enough. But how do you know when someone is at the mental limit assimilating hypnotic suggestions ?
The answer is by groping your way forward with care and lots of feedback. In many respects this is how I’ve become so bound to her, along with the hypnotic suggestions to do so, of course 😉 The time and care taken in this process beyond the official time of sessions is prodigious and the trust that’s developed is beyond anything I have ever known before.
At the beginning she would insist on more than a month between sessions. Now she rubs her hand in glee when a scheduling backup means an intense run of sessions very close together.
Amongst many unanswered questions in this piece is a very simple one, what does she get out of it ? I can think of many things, but perhaps the best summary is that she seems to love the process of being able to nurture and shape melody. There’s two parts to that. The first is nurturing melody in to being all that she could be as a female. The second part is where the domme takes over and it’s to do with shaping melody’s fetish and kinky behaviours and desires.
I’ll leave it for other posts to describe the journey and the deeper effects, such as how it became a D/s relationship. Some effects arrive abruptly and others take months to manifest. Then there’s the progression in to brain washing which can be used for good or ill and has you facing the fundamental question: how much do you trust your D/s hypnotist ?