SwirlingFire: Survive: Part 2
Reading Time: 3 minutes
Survive: Part 2 [Part one of @SwirlingFire’s survival guide is here: Survive – Part 1]
Swirlingfire
SwirlingFire: Survive: Parts 1 & 2
Reading Time: 4 minutes
Survive How to survive:- Wake up every morning but you wish you hadn’t Make a morning coffee and sit quietly contemplating what horrors will be reactivated inside ones mind Start the process of slipping back into auto pilot to care for #Mothership Navigate around the home without falling apart into a tearful sobbing mess so […]
SwirlingFire: Judgemental vs Moral Compass
Reading Time: 4 minutes
Judgemental vs Moral Compass A fire is burning so strong inside me that I’m struggling to extinguish the growing flames. I’m unable to direct the heat to those that should hear my words.
SwirlingFire: Laughter, Tears, Twisted Thoughts and Fears
Reading Time: 3 minutes
Laughter, Tears, Twisted Thoughts and Fears Current status: sat in coffee shop reviewing Wicked Wednesday entries for prompt 365 -Laughter Laughing and giggling with an almost four year old and his little brother Charlie. The innocence of childhood in an apparent happy family unit. Both little boys were animated in their conversation with me, from […]
SwirlingFire: Laughter
Reading Time: 2 minutes
#WickedWednesday Prompt #365 – Laughter This Shirley temple giggle gif is probably the one I’m known for using most frequently – when I’ve genuinely giggled with a tweet thread. Extract: During a laugh, respiration, heart rate and blood pressure temporarily rise. This causes oxygen to surge through the bloodstream that then results in lower blood […]
SwirlingFire: The Request
Reading Time: 7 minutes
The Request I’ve never made a secret of my introduction into the depraved and darkly delicious addictive ways of a malevolent dom of shady intentions. I think I’ve written more than thirty blogs about the ways I was manipulated and coerced into a non-consensual D/s “affair” – which, upon reflection can be termed as “CNC”. […]
SwirlingFire: Ignite
Reading Time: 7 minutes
Ignite Emotional abusers within the BDSM community are moving amongst us. They’re well known yet continue to “operate” shielded by sycophants. Often known as an “enabler” DM conversations have repeated the same names. Over and over again. Some of my online experiences (I’ll take 50%) have been through misunderstandings. Mine and theirs. I don’t give offence, it’s […]
SwirlingFire: Gaslighting & Ghosting
Reading Time: 4 minutes
Gaslighting & Ghosting 7 Stages of Gaslighting in a Relationship The term originates from the Film ‘Fanny by Gaslight’ – A charming and handsome man with a dastardly past exploits his knowledge of her family history to manipulate an innocent young woman.
SwirlingFire: Clique Bait
Reading Time: 6 minutes
Clique Bait I’ve been thinking about the way I express myself quite a lot lately. Especially in the speedy way that Twitter makes my mind race too fast. I’ve mentioned in the past that what passes for my extremely dry/gallows/friendly sarcasm in real life is greatly skewed in typed form. Intonation, giggle, smiles and […]
SwirlingFire: Reflections Part 2 – Exposed
Reading Time: 4 minutes
Reflections Part 2 – Exposed Married lovers ? Non Consensual non monogamous relationships Poly with multiple partners that other partners don’t know you’re Involved with but really should? Untreated STI Lying about sexual health Hiding our real sexual orientation or who we really feel we are (apologies don’t know correct term/phrase) Non disclosure of marital […]
SwirlingFire: Glowing Embers
Reading Time: 4 minutes
CONTENT WARNING Mild references to Gaslighting Mild references to Sexual Assault “….. How will you re-engage with counselling ? You have a shit load to say now ! …..”
SwirlingFire: Reflection
Reading Time: 5 minutes
Reflection When we, okay I, think of blogging, I always think of the romantic frothy persona created by Carrie Bradshaw – the lead character from ‘sex and the City’ all those years ago. The truth is my life is nothing like hers apart from one (two if you count luxury footwear) major similarity. […]
SwirlingFire: Circle of Flames
Reading Time: 4 minutes
Circle of Flames Something has been playing on my mind for quite some time. Boundaries. I realise I’ve never had many or as I’m beginning to accept – any. On early arrival onto Twitter somebody during the course of a DM conversation used the term ‘people pleaser’. The descriptions certainly echoed many things […]
SwirlingFire: Silent Scream
Reading Time: 2 minutes
Silent Scream I’m sat cross legged on a squishy futon. As I brush fluff from my trousers The woman opposite mirrors me. Expertly examining my face and body language for “tells”. I smile inwardly whilst feeling that familiar catch in my throat and my chest tightening are about to betray my cool exterior. I’m usually […]
SwirlingFire: Toxic Masculinity
Reading Time: < 1 minute
Toxic Masculinity At times I’m told I’m too honest for my own good. In the workplace, mainly men led, I’m strong, capable and a ‘feisty little thing’. Although not always welcomed positively, my direction brings rapid results and successful conclusions. “Not bad for a girl. Well done !” Swirlingfire: A Posting History […]
SwirlingFire: Mentor
Reading Time: 4 minutes
CONTENT WARNING TRIGGER WARNING Emotional Abuse Mentor When I first starting spending time with mindWizard I had no idea what my kinks were or how to articulate themes. I would get phases of him sending perfect bodied adults in typical B&W photos/gif. Not once did I knowingly consent to any other activity except OTK […]
SwirlingFire: Burn
Reading Time: 6 minutes
CONTENT WARNING TRIGGER WARNING Emotional Abuse Burn I’m feeling extremely fragile today. This morning a light bulb moment not only flashed, it also shattered. It all started reading a wonderful post via ‘ Floss does life ‘ about humiliation / degradation and how it plays out in scenes for both the Top and the Bottom. That […]
SwirlingFire: Pyrric Victory
Reading Time: < 1 minute
200 Days No Contact I’m surprised that I’ve managed to get to a landmark number of zero contact with the mindWizard. It’s been really difficult to not turn to him regularly when I needed to talk about my mental health – ironically the issues he caused with his Narcissist ways. For those of you struggling […]
SwirlingFire: Hey Swirly …. Read This !
Reading Time: 5 minutes
CONTENT WARNING TRIGGER WARNING Sexual Assault Recovery Rape References – no details Mental Health Emotional Abuse A kindly DM from a follower recommending I read a blog post. I was cautious as I generally disregard bloggers that refuse point blank or rarely use CW on any of their posts. I read the piece after being […]
SwirlingFire: Vesuvius
Reading Time: 4 minutes
I feel myself slipping back into old patterns. It’s very difficult to understand if you’ve improved yourself when so much time is spent alone. Devoid of meaningful personal contact and care of friends/lovers it’s very subjective isn’t it ? For example – I much preferred living in sweet sweet denial when I thought all men […]