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Truth and Respect “…. You play with your prey before death – I go straight for the jugular…..” The most insightful way I learn about my self daily is from conversations with trusted confidantes. These people are an extremely rare commodity in my life. I never trust easily, with good reason. I don’t offer my […]
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Coffee and WiFi I’m sat in the little coffee place I’ve walked passed a thousand times. It’s the only place open locally to sit and write with WiFi. It’s full of men having very late breakfast style plates of food. It’s bustling and very popular with the non coffee house type set one normally sees […]
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Kintsugi – Beautifully Flawed I’m not entirely certain why I’ve been in two minds to release the most current (as yet unavailable) blog post. The hardest part is not in the writing but the “setting free” – not the words/grammar/subject matter. It’s the knowledge that my thoughts are committed to writing. I was posed […]
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Whilst trying to reconcile my past traumas (until very recently repressed) and also with my current state of learning how I’d been treated badly by a d-type, I started thinking about the chronology of my life. Memories comes thick and fast. A minimum of a shudder – and sometimes, a full body blow impact. Time […]
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CONTENT WARNING Gaslighting Mental Abuse I was walking home from work tonight, a usual occurrence. A few recent chats had been swirling around my head Firstly …… are submissives a certain type of character in general terms ? or are S types very open about who they are and life traumas experienced ? […]
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Day 93 – No Contact I’ve felt weak many times but resisted the strong pull to message. It wasn’t easy but I’ve stayed strong. This is the longest time period I’ve ever known without any form of contact from him. I woke up this morning feeling pretty good but drained. My block […]
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My earliest learnt form of “Self Defence” was displayed as “Verbal Attack” It’s taking time to release old patterns. Please have patience with me until a new and better service is available & powered by fresh beginnings This post started as a tweet. My attention had been drawn to a tweet of […]
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It struck me as an unusual prompt. However, in usual Swirly fashion thoughts came thick and fast and locked my phone keyboard at the speed I was trying to write all my firing synaptic connections and word catalytic converters into more blog post ideas. Unfortunately the ideas hit me right in the […]
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Voice Control Swirlingfire: A Posting History @Swirlingfire, 7 November 2018
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Editor’s Note: I’ve been hosting posts from SwirlingFire for about 6 weeks now and not since that first introduction have I added words around what she’s written. When I saw the draft of this post I knew I would have to add something. Reading it brought out all sorts of emotions in me that I […]
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If you’ve passed by here in the last month or so you’ll have noticed that there’s another voice sharing my blog space. I must admit that the momentum leading up to offering to publish someone else’s thoughts took me by surprise.
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Friendships Do friendships have a season ? I’ve been reflecting upon the last twelve months. October 2017 was not a good one. Disappointments, several cancellations of birthday plans and consequent loss of work and income, lies and deceit. Realisations of deep rooted memories returning and #Motherships diagnosis of cognitive impairment. I was totally overwhelmed without […]
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Swirling Reflections Sitting up in bed with a cuppa. Awake for hours. I set the alarm for a day I’m not working. Plus the clocks went back an hour (GMT), so a 5.30am rude awakening. Feeling the grip at my throat; It’s not the physical hand of another. It’s the mental vice that held me […]
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Content Warning: mild references to sexual/mental abuse Fortitude noun: bravery when dealing with pain or difficulty, esp. over a long period “… I must admit, I find your fortitude in this roller coaster mind boggling……. ” October It’s always been a month of mixed emotions. As a child it trawls up memories of birthday parties and blowing out […]
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Content Warning: mild references to sexual/mental abuse Sink Or Swim Today someone posed the theory “….. The reality is that most of the time is spent treading water……..?” The statement passed me by me yet started to swirl around inside my thoughts for a few hours. It made me realise that I’ve never trodden water […]
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Reality kicks in When the bile rises from your gut to your throat Chest tightens as one tries to catch their breath.
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“The unexamined life is not worth living…….” – Socrates, at his trial. I’m not a classics scholar nor claiming to be adroit in ancient philosophy texts. This phrase popped into my head after a non alcoholic long lunch with someone that I once thought of as a very good friend. We’re no longer as close […]
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Who am I …? Who are YOU …? @SwirlingFire How we describe ourselves is not the way others see us. Forget the outside package. That’s not who we are. That’s what we look like. That’s a big problem for me. Many of us make snap decisions based on external/visible traits. We rarely see the true […]
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I had my start in blogging as a result of a very unexpected and flattering approach to write a guest post on another blog. Now it’s my turn to offer a space to another person. I’ve only known her for a few weeks. She’s complex, witty and dealing with the curve balls that life throws […]