Consent & Contracts

Consent is a topic that’s currently on a lot of people’s minds.  Before diving in to this post I should state that consent is a good thing, there should be consent 100% of the time one is engaged.  How consent is maintained, updated and revoked is heavily nuanced by the circumstances and the people involved. 

When the Shackles Come Off

There’s an erotic symbolism when a session starts and she puts on the cuffs.  It’s a first step in the submission to feel the bondage restriction around the wrists.  It sets you up for what’s to come.  Doesn’t matter if it’s to be gentle or hard, the cuffs are a reminder that for this space in time you… Read More »

Can You Repair a Broken Soul ?

The break up wasn’t a break up in the traditional sense.  No drama, no acrimony.  Simply a flow from one state to another.  In the first state she was an active domme and in the second, she wasn’t.  In the first state I was her sub, in the second, a close friend.  

The Mark of Cane

Depending on your point of view I am one of those people, fortunate or unfortunate enough to heal quickly from BDSM punishment.  Or more correctly, for the visible marks to fade quickly.  Usually the deeper pain will also be gone quite rapidly unless she does something dramatic that borders on being a bit dangerous.

Gender Fluid Identity

For most of my life I’ve asked questions of myself regarding sexuality and gender.  I have to admit that for many years I never really understood they were separate questions.  Some 25+ years ago I got my first access to the Internet and started to find some answers that I could quite happily live with.

3 Types of Flagellants

A while back I saw a tweet from the inestimable @WhoresOfYore and made a note of it at the time.  If you’ve never followed her, I highly recommend that you do.  

Taking your kink to work

It’s the little things that can thrill or amuse.  There are the things that you might try in order to experience the thrill of potential discovery.  And there are the things that can be seen and assumed to be normal.