One Year On

This is a rather unexpected millmilestone – this blog is one year old. When first committing metaphorical pen to paper it’s easy to believe that you must craft a masterpiece every time.  That way lies madness and one soon learns that you’d never publish anything under that regime. There are three things that really stand out from one… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Good Girl

  “…… **The dreaded drop that messes with your head.  Fortunately, that level of drop doesn’t happen to me often.  But I have also felt the massive high that only a satisfied sub who feels useful can feel.  The feeling that I’ve satisfied and pleased someone….. “ My Submission – taken and stirred. Until a few years ago I never… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Overshare

  Some of us share so much about our private lives without the full knowledge of where and by whom this information is being collated.  For what purpose ?  Who will be able to find us and learn our true identities with a few keystrokes / computer keyboard wizardry ? We make choices based upon individual circumstances and… Read More »

SwirlingFire: Twitter Changed My Life …

  I’ve actually explored this topic before.  My launch as SwirlingFire was literally a baptism by fire. I’d not learnt to use my voice.  I’d become a passive mute when it mattered.  When I started to speak it was a lava flow of frustration, hurt, anger, sadness, self realisation, unknown grief and too many memories of trauma returning… Read More »

SwirlingFire: (Don’t) Come for Daddy

Content Warning: Mild reference to mental abuse. I’ve had long spells of celibacy sporadically from my twenties right up until I met “the mind wizard”. I went on dates, with lovely men (or so I thought at the time) it was rare to meet someone that knew how to communicate with me.  I let a few goods ones… Read More »

#SinfulSunday – Casual Encounter

Something of an experimental foray in to #SinfulSunday Swap the court shoes for boots of similar heel height and you have what melody wore in public on Friday.        

SwirlingFire: An Uncomfortable Path ….

I always thought the main reason for life was having dreams and goals, working hard and achieving great personal things in life.  The destination. Many years later, older, I’m not so sure any wiser or mature, I find I’m growing in ways that feel so alien. As much as I dislike the phrase, this new time in my… Read More »

Noise Phobic or a Snob ?

I can come across as a right anti-social little bugger.  One of the reasons is that I have low threshold tolerance to ambient noise.  I’ve always been that way and recently it’s got significantly worse.  The trigger for this thought train came from a Twitter thread on films.  It becomes a bit of a joke when similar discussions… Read More »

SwirlingFire: #Blocked

  Your grief is not tolerated here – #Blocked I was angry in the past when I was unable to articulate the flood of memories of my past and later life trauma returning.  Unfortunately people were caught up inside my emotional tsunami.  A SwirlWind or a SwirlStorm as it was later referenced Only a few people had the… Read More »

Beyond Trust

I tend to get caught up in semantics and precisely what a word means to me.  Lately my thoughts have turned to the word vulnerable and it’s sibling, vulnerability and how my changing perceptions relate to another key word, trust.

SwirlingFire: Truth and Respect

Truth and Respect “…. You play with your prey before death – I go straight for the jugular…..” The most insightful way I learn about my self daily is from conversations with trusted confidantes.  These people are an extremely rare commodity in my life.  I never trust easily, with good reason.  I don’t offer my friendship unless I’m… Read More »