I recently published a post Consent & Contracts on how contracts in D/s can at best blur the issues of consent and at worst lead to abuse. When I wrote it I had in mind to write a separate post relating how I migrated from the world of fantasy in to a full blown real chastity D/s relationship, which included… Read More »
Consent is a topic that’s currently on a lot of people’s minds. Before diving in to this post I should state that consent is a good thing, there should be consent 100% of the time one is engaged. How consent is maintained, updated and revoked is heavily nuanced by the circumstances and the people involved.
I find this an odd topic to contemplate on a personal level. I can read articles from people who are very aware of their preferred pronouns and I’ve come to understand why this is an important issue to them. Having said that, as the combined entity of him and her I am starting to have a strange relationship… Read More »
There’s an erotic symbolism when a session starts and she puts on the cuffs. It’s a first step in the submission to feel the bondage restriction around the wrists. It sets you up for what’s to come. Doesn’t matter if it’s to be gentle or hard, the cuffs are a reminder that for this space in time you… Read More »
I thought it time to write of the first domme I knew in the flesh as there’s an unexpected twist to the tale.
I’ve seen posts with many variations of this theme. People asking themselves if they are normal or perceived as normal. Indeed, what is normal ? Obviously, I’ve asked the same questions of myself over the years. I think the question pre-supposes a certain level of self-awareness. If you never question elements of your own make up in comparison… Read More »
I’ve been suckered by labels again. Just when I thought I’d cleaned out the last of them, hubris brings me back to earth.
I can’t speak for female subs, but the drivers for a male sub can be pathological. At some level we are all seeking attention.
The break up wasn’t a break up in the traditional sense. No drama, no acrimony. Simply a flow from one state to another. In the first state she was an active domme and in the second, she wasn’t. In the first state I was her sub, in the second, a close friend.
This post is not about D/s nor is it funny. It’s about being angry at a re-awakening to the dark, vicious and sick side of humanity. Please move on if you’re looking to be amused. This is not an easy post.
Depending on your point of view I am one of those people, fortunate or unfortunate enough to heal quickly from BDSM punishment. Or more correctly, for the visible marks to fade quickly. Usually the deeper pain will also be gone quite rapidly unless she does something dramatic that borders on being a bit dangerous.
For most of my life I’ve asked questions of myself regarding sexuality and gender. I have to admit that for many years I never really understood they were separate questions. Some 25+ years ago I got my first access to the Internet and started to find some answers that I could quite happily live with.
My original series of posts for PainAsPleasure was recently reposted on this blog MELODY’S STORY – part 3, hypnosis in BDSM and I am very grateful to one concerned commenter with whom there was a wonderful conversation allowing me to expand on the safety aspects that aren’t apparent in the posts on hypnosis.